I am now twenty. I suspect this is a clerical error, since I believe myself to be twelve still. I may be older, since my Mum and Dad gave me socks (among other things). My Mum seems to be psychic, since I was about to go and buy a new pair of gloves, and was considering a pair of leather ones instead of the big thermal ski gloves I have been wearing and sure enough, I unwrap a pair of leather gloves that fit me perfectly. I really don't know how she manages it.   I made the mistake of volunteering to go shopping on a Saturday and had to queue for forty minutes at the checkout in Sainsbury's. I also bought a copy of F-22 Air Dominance Fighter, a flight simulator. This, like Worms 2 and F1 Racing Simulation, could have been a mistake. It is very realistic, which means that it takes ages to learn how to fly the thing properly, let alone how to engage in air-to-air combat. Time - I need more hours in the day.
			The characters and situations in this diary are entirely imaginary and bear no relation to any real person or actual happenings. Any resemblance to such things is coincidental, or just for humourous effect. All names have been chosen to implicate the innocent.