Much excitement today when Chris decided, in his wisdom, to smash a bottle of tomato ketchup. This wanton destruction seemed to have no reason behind it. I can only assume Chris does not like ketchup. He tried to disguise the violence as an 'accident', as the bottle 'slipped' from his hand and bounced on the bench before rebounding onto the cooker from Chris' hand and then falling to the floor and breaking, leaving a mound of cold ketchup with bits of broken glass sticking out from it. Ketchup had splattered artistically onto the cupboard doors in a rather vegetarian Tarantino manner.   As Chris scraped the ketchup/glass mixture from the floor, I began thinking about the links between time, gravity and impending disaster. During a disaster of this nature, the bottle fell more slowly than it should have done. This could be due to a weakened gravity field, or the slowing down of time in the region of the bottle. I do not have enough quantitative data to produce the equation linking the rate of time passing, the local gravitational field strength and the disasterousness of the incident (the disaster quotient). I suspect that time is a more important factor than gravity, since lower gravity should have resulted in Chris being able to catch it. A hefty research budget and a less ham-fisted lab assistant may be required to find this out.
			The characters and situations in this diary are entirely imaginary and bear no relation to any real person or actual happenings. Any resemblance to such things is coincidental, or just for humourous effect. All names have been chosen to implicate the innocent.